Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Funny Memories and a coyote heart

I have become addicted to this blog Tierd. It is one of Hilary's friends (and I've never met her), but she writes about her family and especially her kids. I am completely addicted and always look forward to a new post, and she is really good about posting every day or at least every other day (unlike moi). Anywho, her posts sometimes remind me of silly/ funny memories of me and my sister - like this one.

In Madisonville, all the kindergarten classes take a class trip to my dad's vet clinic (or at least they used to) to see how a vet clinic works and learn about animal health, etc. My parents would remove all the animals in the kennels and would replace them with me and my sister's stuffed animals. So when the kids took a tour, they would see pink bunny rabbits, Care Bears, and Poppels behind the bars instead of depressed, sick dogs and cats. Anywho, my dad had an office in the clinic where he did his work. On his desk, he had animal bones, specimen jars, and other doctor type accessories, but one really caught my attention- a jar containing a coyote heart with heart worms.

However, I need to back track a little. My sister is four years older than me and was born premature - very premature. She was tiny at birth, and I believe her lungs weren't fully developed (but I could be making that up). Anywho, somehow as a kid, I learned this information and knew that when Abra was born, she wasn't completely healthy and had to stay in the hospital. So begins the delusions of a six year old.

When my class visited my dad's vet clinic, of course I showed off. I would point to the stuffed animals and say "that one is MINE, and that one is Abra's" and tell them their names, etc. When we got to my dad's office, and I think our teacher and my dad must have stepped out for a minute because I don't remember any adults being there, I began telling my classmates all about my sister's problems at birth. I pointed to the coyote heart and told them what I believed was the truth at the time. "That jar is my sister's heart. When she was born she needed a new one so my dad gave them the coyote heart, and they put hers back in that jar."

Yup, I told my kindergarten class that my sister had a coyote heart, and her "real" heart was sitting on my dad's desk in this vet clinic. Although this is a ridiculous lie, I really believed it. I have no idea when I realized that it wasn't true, but up until about 3rd grade I think most of my friends believed me. And Carnell Craft, a boy in my class, asked me about this lie whenever we graduated high school. So I'm sorry Abra that I told everyone you had a coyote heart, but isn't that a great story.

Thursday, April 16, 2009


- Liem called me a few weeks ago, no progress in job...I have given up :(
- Working at Target in the market area, it sucks, but it's money
- Wore a tank dress and flip flops today - yay spring
- Hung out by the lake near our house and have finally started on my summer tan; this is the whitest I have ever been (including the womb).
- Lent is over and being a non meat-eater wasn't that bad, but the pork tenderloin on Easter was AMAZING
- Parents visited on Easter, and I miss them even more than ever
- I'm traveling to Texas (minus the Daler...sad) for Abra's graduation
- Everyone's birthday is coming up - Abra, Mom, Dale, Cliff, Neil, Jenni, and Susie (although she is in June); I'm putting on my creative/thinking cap for this next 2 months
- I'm SO ready for a real job and am battling a new bout of depression; I think the anti-news from Liem sent me over the edge but having the Target job is helping and spring too
- Trying to workout more regularly; the schedule on the fridge lasted a few days...lame
- Went running yesterday and really wish I was an awesome athlete like Corey or at least half as dedicated
- Craving some new spring/ summer clothes - but it's highly unlikely for a while
- Dale and I are debt free (except for some student loans) - yay tax refund!
- Super inspired by my book Handmade Nation and can't wait for the documentary which should come out in May
- Uber jealous of all the corporate Target peeps that hang out at the store, analyzing the displays and/or buying lunch
- Running out of job ideas and need help...let me know if you know anyone in MN
- Missing my friends in TX (and CA, IL, NY)..ready to make some real friends here and have ladies to chat with
- Again, SO READY for a real job/ career, but heading off to Target to work the evening shift :)

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Inspired to Write by Say Hello, Wave Goodbye by David Gray

There are those moments in your life you never forget. Your first kiss. Riding your bike without your training wheels. The first night alone after losing a loved one.

This was one of the moments. I took a step onto the dock knowing it was a step toward the future and away from the past. I was ashamed that a tear escaped and choked back the emotion. I could hear the ocean behind me and the uncomfortable silence in front of me. I stared at the three strangers waiting just steps away. They had taken a long journey to wait for me here. Of course, I had taken an even longer journey to get here and this moment.

I never knew I would feel more friendship, more kindness, more familiarity with a group of course sailors than my own family. But of course now, they had become my family. I nervously took another step forward feeling the harsh sun burning my cheeks. The ocean's wind whipped my cropped hair against my face, slapping it without any remorse. I had been looking forward to this moment for the last 6 months, and now I was here and I wanted more than anything to turn around back to the ship and my family.

But my real family had their tears in their eyes too. I'm not sure from joy of seeing me or guilt of not recognizing their abandoned daughter. My father stepped forward, grasping my trunk and breaking the frozen moment. I quickly gave a sad wave to my old family and followed my flesh and blood towards the future leaving the ocean, the ship, the adventure and my family behind me...as if it were a dream...a sad, hard, but all too glorious dream.